Mary Anne's Father - really strict?

[aln1982]

The books always mention how "strict" Mary Anne's dad is but I've been wondering if this is true. Sure, he's super organized but did he only make her wear the little girl clothes and keep her room the way he wanted it because he didn't know any better? And is this really being strict? I don't think that a "strict" father would allow their 13 year old daughter to have a steady boyfriend (even though Richard does have the rule that they can't go in the house when he is not home). Anyone have thoughts on this?

[macca]

It's possible that Richard was just assumed that girls like pink frills and wear dresses and skirts, but if Mary Anne had voiced her dislike of those things and he made actual rules to ensure that her room stayed looking like a nursery and that her hair was always in braids, not only is that unusually strict, it's downright weird.

Mary Anne's dad wasn't really strict past those first few books, though. There weren't any restrictions on her and she had all the same privileges as her friends, especially once Sharon came on the scene.

[Amalia]

I remember in Secret Life of MA, where Richard said that if MA couldn't pay off the bills for all of the Christmas presents she bought then she would have to pay the interest that mounts up from it. That seem kind of strict.

[sparklymouse]

/\ I wouldn't call that strict, I'd call that good parenting. He was trying to teach her money management and responsibility. He definitely didn't spoil Mary Anne, but he wasn't that strict after Mary Anne saved Jenny P's insides from boiling. Forget all the vacations, a strict parent wouldn't have let her babysit for strangers or ride in a car with a teenage driver (Charlie). I'd like to think Mary Anne didn't talk to him about stuff cause he was so stuffy and personality-free and not cause she was afraid of what his reaction would be.

[macca]

He definitely didn't spoil Mary Anne, but he wasn't that strict after Mary Anne saved Jenny P's insides from boiling.

;D I love your altered titles and snarky descriptions! Too funny!

Forget all the vacations, a strict parent wouldn't have let her babysit for strangers or ride in a car with a teenage driver (Charlie).

And if he'd found out that she'd been running around completely unsupervised with a virtual stranger during her "mother's helper" vacations, he'd have blasted those irresponsible Pike parents, who didn't even insist on meeting the girls' dates. It would've been really good form to send one of those girls' home pregnant - which wouldn't be unheard of in this day and age.

[hitzpink]

I do think that Mr. Spier was quite lenient when it came to the steady boyfriend, the babysitting, and the constant stream of vacations with friends, but I find the braids and frills and kneesocks a bit hard to swallow. They always say that he made Mary Anne dress like that, so I don't think it's a matter of him just "not knowing" that a 13 year old doesn't want to dress like an 8 year old. Plus, I just find a father dictating what his daughter wears (and especially making her dress like a little girl) is just creepy as hell. Sure, nobody wants their 13 year old to wear microskirts and tubetops, but he took it to an extreme.

[sparklymouse]

I think he was strict in Kristy's Great Idea, at least from Kristy's point of view. No personal calls after dinner, 10 minute calls, and the flashlight talk were all kind of weird. Especially the flashlight one when Kristy said something like "so far Mary Anne's never been caught by her father and she planned on keeping it that way." Really, what would he have done? Nailed a board over her window so she couldn't look out it?

In MA Saves the Day he said goodnight to MA and asked what book she was reading and she was quick to point out that it was on her teacher recommendation list. I suppose he could have been a little snobby about books like Claud's parents. MA also had to say "yes" instead of "yeah". Most kids grow out of using slang on their own, so that was kind of extreme. It's not like she was swearing.

[jen]

He was a lot different in the first four books than he was in the rest of the series. In Mary Anne's portrait collection, Richard is strict, but still warm and loving, and him and Mary Anne have a very close relationship throughout her childhood. However, that was written after the first four, and when the series was first thought up, there were only supposed to be four books... So maybe originally, Richard was stern and strict and crazy. But then he loosened up, and then when they wrote about their childhoods, they forgot how strict he was.

[macca]

So maybe originally, Richard was stern and strict and crazy. But then he loosened up, and then when they wrote about their childhoods, they forgot how strict he was.

Or maybe (and this is just a guess, because I haven't read Mary Anne's portrait yet) Richard was the type of parent who had no idea how to deal with adolescents, but knew how to be warm and affectionate towards young children? Maybe the idea of a teenage/tweenage girl terrified Richard and he responded by shutting himself off from MA. Although the way MA Saves the Day was written, it sounds as if Richard had always been uptight and cold.

[aln1982]

sparklymouse said:

/\ I wouldn't call that strict, I'd call that good parenting. He was trying to teach her money management and responsibility. He definitely didn't spoil Mary Anne, but he wasn't that strict after Mary Anne saved Jenny P's insides from boiling. Forget all the vacations, a strict parent wouldn't have let her babysit for strangers or ride in a car with a teenage driver (Charlie). I'd like to think Mary Anne didn't talk to him about stuff cause he was so stuffy and personality-free and not cause she was afraid of what his reaction would be.

These are my thoughts too. I think a lot of his being "strict" was Mary Anne being too afraid to speak up - not necessarily because of him but because she is so shy. In one of the books, it mentioned that he used to work at home on the weekends so he could spend more time with Mary Anne. This really improved my opinion of him. I also thought he tried really hard to be a good step dad to Dawn and Jeff. He's a formal kind of guy but not a bad one or a tyrant, in my opinion. I think the girls exaggerate a little when referring to him as "really strict".

[jen]

In MA Saves the Day, it sounds like throughout her childhood, he was strict and standoffish, and that they were never close. That's definitely not the case in Mary Anne's Book - I thought Richard was a great parent in that. Although I suppose that yes, maybe he changed as she grew older... But from #4, it sounded like he was always like that.

[macca]

^ Until he became yet another indifferent Stoneybrook parent after marrying Sharon.

They should've kept a somewhat strict parent in the series. I think a lot of kids would relate to it - I know I could never identify with these "free range" girls who's parents never interfered with their lives much at all.

[jen]

That'd just be far too realistic, macca! I still can't believe that any parent would leave babies (including six month old twins!) in the care of 11 and 13 year olds.

[ktag]

It's not just that the parents didn't interfere, it's crazy how little they know about what goes on in the girls' lives. I just read MA's Bad Luck Mystery, ie: the BSC go to the cemetery at midnight because of an anonymous threatening note. None of their parents had any clue what they were going to do or that anything had even happened after the fact. It was funny how completely naive the girls were, but definitely one of those "what were they thinking?!" plots. It seems like on the rare occassions a parent realizes something's going on, the girl will either brush it off or ask advice about a very minor part of the problem and the parent will be completely satisfied. They could probably go on a road trip to Mexico, and their parents would just assume they're on some extended babysitting job.

[jen]

They could probably go on a road trip to Mexico, and their parents would just assume they're on some extended babysitting job.

Hehehe, that's so true! I suppose the lack of parental control/guidance/intereference just makes for more exciting reading. Although in "Claudia and the Terrible Truth", she does ask her mum for advice. And her parents play a pretty big role in that.